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DHS Says: Confront Mass Killers With Scissors

From the New York Post:

Homeland Security has advice for confronting mass murders: scissors

By S.A. MILLER | January 31, 2013

WASHINGTON — Is your workplace getting shot up by a crazed gunman? No problem — just grab a pair of scissors and fight back!

That’s some of the helpful advice in a new instructional video from the Department of Homeland Security that was posted on the agency’s Web site just a month after the massacre at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Connecticut.

“If you are caught out in the open and cannot conceal yourself or take cover, you might consider trying to overpower the shooter with whatever means are available,” says the narrator in the video, which shows an office worker pulling scissors out of a desk drawer.

The video, titled “Options for Consideration,” also advises that people who get caught in an “active shooter” situation should run away, hide under a desk or take cover out of the line of fire.

Thank goodness we have highly paid professionally trained bureaucrats available to give us great advice like that. This is right up their with the DHS’ advice about stretching before shoveling snow, and remembering to take off cold wet clothes.

The nearly four-minute-long video opens with chilling scenes from the 2007 Virginia Tech massacre, the 2009 mass shooting at Fort Hood in Texas, and the 2011 attempted assassination of Gabrielle Giffords.

But the video quickly shifts to hokey footage of office workers scampering under desks, crouching in corners and racing into closets to hide from a rampaging gunman on the loose.

“To protect your hiding place, lock the door if you can. Block the door with heavy furniture,” recommends the male narrator, speaking in measured, authoritative tones.

Other survival strategies promoted in the video include hiding “behind large items such as cabinets or desks. Remain quiet. Silence your cellphone or pager. Even the vibration setting can give away a hiding position.”

They might also recommend taking down any ‘gun free zone’ signs.

Richard Feldman, president of the Independent Firearm Owners Association, said he has a better option for consideration than a pair of scissors when confronting an armed mass murderer — a legal firearm.

“That’s why I prefer a gun, and I usually do carry a gun when it is lawful to do so,” said Feldman. “Clearly, you use whatever you can” to fight for your life, he said…

What kind of crazy talk is that? We hold Mr. Feldman’s doctor contacts the authorities so that he can be put away.

The video is part of the Obama administration’s ongoing campaign to reduce firearm violence in the wake of the horrific mass murder last month of 20 children and six teachers in Newtown, Conn., said a Homeland Security official…

The video was released to coincide with President Obama’s sweeping proposals to curb gun violence in America, said the official…

The only trouble is, all the scissors in that Sandy Hook school would have been ‘safety scissors.’

Besides, once people starting hurting each other with scissors, they will have to be banned as well.

This article was posted by Steve on Thursday, January 31st, 2013. Comments are currently closed.

6 Responses to “DHS Says: Confront Mass Killers With Scissors”

  1. mr_bill says:

    The Department of Homeland Security can’t offer anything better than “run and hide?!” Anybody who takes this advice seriously should avoid the scissors, because their wimpy, limp wrist won’t be able to supply the necessary force to stab anybody. They’ll probably be the first ones shot anyhow, since the gunman will likely be annoyed by the high pitched screaming. Just wait for somebody with a firearm to save your bacon.

    • River0 says:

      Unbelievably stupid. But Colt or AR could now make a rifle with a ‘scissors bayonet’ in order to get government approval.

      Not to mention the guy in the video grabs the scissors wrong. To be at all useful, they must point forward, parallel to the forearm; not with the point downward, 90 degrees from the angle of the forearm.

  2. untrainable says:

    So, they have updated “Duck and Cover” for the modern era. Now it’s “Duck, Cover, and Turn Off Your Cellphone”.
    Other DHS suggestions include :
    1. Find a large quantity of sand and insert your head until the shooting is over.
    2. Always carry a large white handkerchief so you can effectively signal surrender.
    3. If you can’t find scissors, a stapler can be just as effective.
    4. Pens and pencils can make effective weapons. (DO NOT use Sharpies. Even though you might think because they’re called sharpies that they’re sharp… they’re really not all that sharp)
    5. Get on your knees and raise your hands slowly over your head in a clearly non-threatening manner. This may require regular practice. Do regular surrender drills at home.
    6. And finally if all else fails, put your head between your legs and KISS YOUR ASS GOODBYE.

  3. Astravogel says:

    When scissors are outlawed… We’ll all have scruffy haircuts. I once saw a multiple choice question back during
    the SE Asian War. “There is an enemy pillbox on a hill 10 miles from the coast. What weapon should you use to
    reduce it?” Choices: A Rifle B Bazooka C Tank main gun D Battleship 16″ gun. The correct answer was “D”
    Use the biggest thing you’ve got! Ditto for mass murderers.

  4. captstubby says:

    better still,
    a new instructional video.
    “develope a plan with your supervisor in an “active shooter” situation .”

    The field of fire of a weapon (or group of weapons) is the area around it that it can easily and effectively reach by gunfire.
    .The concept works best as part of a static defence with the area covered by a position plotted out beforehand.
    . Fire can then be called in by spotters to engage specific points in the guns’ field of fire, even if out of sight of the gunners.

    Overlapping guns, creating a crossfire, an important idea.

  5. yadayada says:

    it is all good info for scared unarmed people. and let’s face it- that is not simply what they assume you to be, it is what they want you to be. it’s hard to pass gun control legislation when the crazed gunman is stopped by a citizen who was legally carrying a firearm.
    but realistically duck and cover/run and hide is pretty much what comes naturally to most people in that type of situation. but contrast what they instruct the sheep to do with what you see on the right side of the screen 0:36 seconds into the video. granted, not everyone who carries a weapon is trained to clear a building. I don’t suggest untrained persons should attempt to track down the crazy unless you’ve thought it through and planned for it ahead of time. but at least be ready to cover escape for those around you when the wolf comes a knockin

    even the advice they tell you to do when the cops show up is inadequate. how about giving a sit-rep? describe location and dress of gunman at the very least.

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